Question: Dear Luise: When you are in a love relationship and one partner travels, while that partner is away should she he/she listen to what others say that person is doing? N.
Answer: Dear N. It seems to me that the partner who travels should know about the rumors that are going around. Beyond that, what can you do?
Some people are trustworthy and some aren’t. It’s as simple as that. It’s possible that the trustworthy partner may at times look pretty suspicious and the opposite can also happen…the untrustworthy partner can appear to be above reproach.
Separation and the way people handle it is a mirror of the quality of the relationship. Yet, if there is too much separation, the relationship can die.
Inner ethics differ. Men often think “what the woman doesn’t know won’t hurt her” and women often have the attitude that “love will conquer all”…even separation. To further confuse the issue, the opposite can be true where the guy is true-blue while the woman wanders and lies about it. Every extreme is possible, two liars and heaven help us…the much too rare faithful couple.
Absence doesn’t always make the heart grow fonder…sometimes it tests us. Also, we don’t always react in the same way. A perfect record can be broken through unusual or extenuating circumstances or for no reason at all.
From all of the above, you can see the uncertainly. A separation is only as strong as the individual partners combined. New relationships can be reliable and old ones can falter. A constantly traveling partner can complicate and weaken a relationship, but not if you picked a winner…(and you are one.) Blessings, Luise