Mom Passed Away

Question: Dear Luise: my mom passes away this last may 23, se fought with cancer for 6 long months, coming in and out of the hospital, every day i could tell se looked alittle bit more … tired… or maybe sad, I`m not sure, but she changed over the time, the last week was the worst, she couldn´t wake up, she just had no more energy, i could tell she was hungry, i was with her as much as i could, but she couldn´t eat anything, she was like that for… i guess… 5 or 6 days until, she just stoped breathing. I feel so angry at myself, at everyone, she sufffered an horrible and painfull death, and we did nothing, I know we couldn´t anyway, but there isn´t a single day when I don´t think of her, usually I picture her with a smile on her face, but everytime I end up picturing her in her deathbed, suffering, struggling to breathe, I just don´t know how to go on like this. A.

Answer: Dear A.: My husband passed in February and I know exactly what you are talking about. I was there…holding his hand and singing to him over the sound of his labored breathing when his life ended. You and I will probably always wish we had done more. We are human and fallible but/and there is no way we could hold time back. I am going on because I can’t go back…neither of us can. We were loved. That’s what I hang onto…that and the fact that I loved back. I know those we lost went on when they lost a loved one and now it’s our turn. I am continuing to love my husband’s memory. I have put out a lot of pictures from years ago that showed the quality of his life and I’m honoring what a good job he did of that. I think my grief is something he would never have wanted to consume me…so I am looking back on the joy, more and more. Blessings, Luise



One Response to Mom Passed Away

  1. S. October 12, 2013 at 5:44 pm #

    Thank you for this website..i really needed to read other people that have lost their mom’ mom passed on July 14th 2013, and she was my Very Best Friend, Counselor and Everything to me. Reading your responses Luise is helping me as I see many people w/the same feelings i have of emptiness, lonliness..
    thank you for writing. S.

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