My Son Seems Introverted

Question: Hello Luise: Where might I find resources for my son. He is 15 and so gifted in his thinking process. He is normal in most young adult ways as far as video games, music and computers. But he can spend hours talking to me about worldly matters. History is his thing and he needs somewhere to talk about all these incredible thoughts he has. It is way beyond my interests or knowledge. He spends hours learning about different people’s opinions on everything from 9/11 to the Holocaust. He is a loner who basically has never had kids over to hang out since he was in grade school and yet seems okay with it. Even though his father and I are worried about that. He has tons of online gamer friends but I would like him to be more social. That just isn’t who he is. Is that okay that he is more introverted? He does average in school but does excel in oral skills and history subjects. He barely can pass algebra but again that isn’t his thing. I feel we all are good at a few things and not at others so I don’t worry about algebra really. What do you think? S.

Answer: Dear S. It sounds like you respect and understand your son. That’s a wonderful thing in his life. Most of us don’t excel in all subjects and you are seeing him as an individual.

Again, we are not all highly social and that doesn’t necessarily mean that those of us who are not are lacking.

It’s my sense that your son needs a mentor…someone who is interested and well informed on the subjects that he likes to pursue and who may be able to introduce him to new pursuits. I think that person may need to be an adult to be able to satisfy his curiosity.

Sometimes that can be done with a tutor and sometimes it is available at a private school with smaller classes and a more innovative curriculum. It seems to me that what he is craving is one-on-one stimulation and motivation. If the cost of private schooling is daunting, some have scholarship programs that are not necessarily based on grade point averages and factor in the student’s unique qualities. Blessings, Luise

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