Answer: Dear M.: You have been unsuccessful in defending yourself thus far and I doubt that will change since it’s been five years. You in laws aren’t listening and have no logic to back them up. It’s nuts. Your husband says there is no point in trying because nothing will ever change. I tend to agree with him. They are stuck in a delusional mindset that labels you and your children as second-rate citizens. They are even totally discounting their own son in the same way. Why? Because he didn’t impregnate a promiscuous girl when he was 16? Give me a break!
You have both tried everything I might suggest and, to tell you the truth, I would relocate if it were me. Life is too short to have to live in such a cloistered community with their continued prejudice, rejection and character assassination. Frankly, they sound like people I would never want to know…I don’t care how “influential” they are!
I would also like to suggest that you bring this issue to www.WiseWomeUnite.com : the Web-forum I created specifically for women with issues involving extended families. I think you could find some much-needed support and understanding there. Blessings, Luise