Question: Dear Luise: I am a mother of 30 year old son and have pain I need your help tell me if your 30 year old son tells you he love you verymuch and he don’t know anyone like his mother so kind undrestanding being there for him and etc… but he hates to spend time with me why is that what do I have to do and what should be my reaction. As a mother I am in pain and lost…S.
Answer: Dear S.: Our adult children have to pull away from us to grow up fully. Sometimes they don’t know how to tell us that and sometime we don’t want to let go.
Tell him you appreciate his wonderful complements and understand his desire to spend his time elsewhere. What else can you do? Focus your life in other directions.
You were a complete person before you were a mom and you can be one again. Volunteer somewhere you can be with kids if you want to keep your maternal feelings alive and well while you are letting your son go. He may come back after a few years as a friend. My son did. Blessings, Luise