Question: Hi. I am 26 and my boyfriend is 32. I got pregnant within the first month of our relationship. We seemed to fall in love and have been really close but we haven’t had sex now (even after the baby is born) in 9 months. It drove me to the brink of insanity during my pregnancy hormones, and now its surfacing again, bothering me, even after I feel like I’ve basically given up all hope. When we used to have sex at the beginning it would be very short and not that satisfying, Maybe he is embarrassed about that. Maybe its just that now he’s older his sex drive is lower and we had a kid he doesn’t feel the need to procreate?? I know he’s been with a lot of girls before me. Every time I’ve ever asked about it I get shot down and he says he just doesn’t know why, no explanation of any kind, just drop the subject. I’m beginning to wonder if he is cheating on me or if I’m just going crazy. I can’t live like this! I’m not even a very sexual person but I feel like I’ve never met a guy that’s so disinterested and its freaking me out. No other sexual alternative are acceptable, either. Please help! J.
Answer: Dear J.: 32 is not “older.” He has some serious issues. They aren’t going to go away and you aren’t going to adjust. It’s hard to move on when you have a child but staying is too difficult an assignment for you to take on for the rest of your life. You deserve so much better. Blessings, Luise