Question: Dear Luise: For the last ten years my mother-inlaw and her daughter come to my home and disrespected me. My husband would talk to me about their behavour, but he would never talk them how they behave. When I tried tolet his mom know that she is hurting us she would leave and go stey with her friends, then go back home. This time she did something very bad and I tried to let her know she left and went back home. Now she came back staying her friend and my husband is upset, because she is not stay with her. The last time she left I told her “do not come back unlest we talk about the issue”. She does not talk to my daughter, but she talk to my husband son who is not my child. That the reason I tlod her that, because she is hurting my child. My ten years old is asking me why her grandmother like her bother, but she do not like her. What should I do, my husband is upset because she is at the house. N.
Answer: When your MIL was young, she made her own rules regarding her family and her home. You and your husband have started a new family unit and you have the right and yes, the responsibility, to make your own rules, just the way she once did.
Do the best you can to not become the victim of her gossip. She is abusing you that way, I know. Just try not to buy into it.
Talk with your husband regarding your respect for each other, your home and your children and her disrespect. Then establish your own rules…stick by them and do not let her participate in your lives further unless she agrees and follows through with compliance. If she doesn’t, do not allow her in…she will poison your home. Blessings, Luise