Question: Dear Luise: My boyfriend cannot perform sexually and evidently isn’t very interested in trying to get the blue pill to make it happen. We love each other and are extremely compatible and have a strong spiritual connection. I really would like to have more romance, affection and a sexual relationship. I’m struggling with whether or not it’s important enough to end the relationship or since that part of a relationship sometimes fades anyway, to enjoy life without it. We’re both 60 and have been together for a year. We’ve talked about it and he knows I’m wanting it but he just doesn’t make the effort to see the doctor. He isn’t into other types of sexual play either. Sometimes I think I could live without sex but sometimes I think I’m shortchanging myself, even though I realize at my age there may not be that many options. Help! Why can’t I figure this out?! K.
Answer: Dear K.: You can’t figure it out because you don’t like the answer. That’s my guess. I wouldn’t, either. You are writing to me because you can’t accept it. If you could, you wouldn’t be writing to me. Let him know that love and the physical expression of it are deeply related in your experience and you are going to have to move on before you loose your self-respect. You deserve a lot better. Blessings, Luise