Question: Dear Luise: I was proposed to by a guy today, who happens to be our family friend, too. But we were more like brother sister then anything more. And I never had any such feelings for him. But he is really a nice guy. The problem is I never wanted a guy like him in my life. The definition of my man is something different…he doesn’t fit in that frame. And also I would like to mention that his qualification and personality also don’t match up with me. Please advise me. I’m now in a dilemma. N.
Answer: Dear N.: What makes a successful marriage is a complete mystery to me. Some people marry with very little in common and do very well…and others get everything they thought they wanted in a mate and fail. There are romantic couples and practical couples and couples so mismatched, they look like they must have won each other in a drawing.
It doesn’t sound to me like your heart is in it. To marry someone who has been like a brother to you might be practical from your family’s point of view but it sounds pretty boring. If you can’t get behind the idea, it’s probably best to say “no.”.
It may be wise, however, to let go of any rigid picture you have of what the right guy is going to look like and be like; just let your heart choose for you. Blessings, Luise