Question: Dear Luise: I am struggling as a single mother. I am 26yrs old and have a 5yr old and 3yr old. THEY ARE MY EVERYTHING!! I was a successfulcollege student and worked for the last 2yrs. Because of bad economic decisions on my behalf, I lost our apartment last July. Fortunately,my father gave me his house and moved into a smaller place with his wife. I now have $2,400 in bills each month with barely enough income to survive. I suffer from depression and anxiety. When I lost my home, I became distant and ashamed. I ended up resigning from my amazing job due to the inability to function. I have gained 30ilbs over the last year due to stress, and am basically falling deeper and deeper into the hole I’ve dug myself into. The only way I feel I can make it for my children is if I have some time to refocus. It is so difficult to care for myself when all I can think about is how I have lost control of my life. I drink more…Eat more… Sleep waaaayyy more… Would I be a bad mother to let my father and his wife care for my children for 6-12mos while I straighten up? R.
Answer: Dear R.: Your issue is beyond my background to address. My guess, and that’s all it is, is that it wouldn’t help to send your children away. Missing your children and feeling guilty about that might make things worse for you. Can you move in with them? It sounds to me like you need as much care as your kids do. You are in crisis and need support ASAP. Counseling may be what’s next to get you back on track once that support is established. Blessings, Luise