Question: Dear Luise: I left my children’s father two years ago, and he has regular contact with the children. I have been greiving strongly since the breakup and this has left me quite irritable which has affected my relationship with my 2 and 3 year old girls. My children are ectast when they see my ex, but the eldest does not want to come home. My heart is breaking, I feel has so my bond with my children has been destroyed. Any suggestions? S.
Answer: Dear S.: I would suggest you get into counseling to help you through this. It is too serious to address in a question and answer venue. Most children are very self-absorbed and don’t care if their parents are happy or no. They just want them to stay together for the sake of convenience and security. Very often, after a split, mom becomes the disciplinarian and dad becomes the fun, weekend guy. Working though your feelings without taking it out on your children is something you will have to learn to do. The price of expressing it is way too high and the damage is becoming obvious. Blessings, Luise