Question: Dear Luise: I have been in a relationship with someone for the past 1 1/2 years. He is 28 years older than me, we worked together for 5 years and we are the best of friends we are so compatible we know we have found our mates. He has had a hard life so he is very mature for his age, you would never know his age. Is this wrong or what should I do. My ex-husband wants be back but I feel I am much happier with this other person despite the age issue. Any advice would be helpful. L.
Answer: Dear L.: Please beware of an ex-husband that wants to hook back up. There’s a reason it didn’t work the first time and he’s still the same guy.
I married a man 16 years older than I am and I must say 28 years older sounds daunting. However, there are some ageless couples around that just don’t care about the statistics. If the two of you are compatible and a Soul-match, don’t let age be the deciding factor. You already have 1 1/2 years into the relationship. Why are you questioning it now?
What you do need to face, however, is that you aren’t going to be together for the long haul. You are going to become a care giver and then you’re going to be left alone in all probability. My husband will be 100 years old in October and is in a nursing facility on the same retirement campus where I live. I go to see him every day and take our little dog over with me. We had 10 good years before he started going down hill and then five more that were limited but rewarding. The last six have been difficult for both of us.
For some love is enough…for others the security of probable longevity rules. You have to look into your own heart. I think you already know the answer. Blessings, Luise