Question: Dear Luise: I’m having a hard time finding satisfaction in my adult life. I know we can’t stay kids forever and in some ways going to college prolonged that, but having a job and being independent seems like a hollow victory. Yes, I’ve gotten work in my chosen field and I know I have to start at the bottom, but I see way too many people around me who seem to have stayed at the bottom. Right now, I see myself as making money, paying bills, going to work and not really having the life I had hoped for. I had high hopes for adventure and making a difference. I feel like a cog. Ted
Answer: Dear Ted: I want to start out by complimenting you on your awareness. You have no idea how many people live out their entire lives without ever going to where you presently find yourself. And yes, I know it’s very uncomfortable at the moment. I don’t know what your background is religiously or philosophically, so I will just have to deal in generalities.
Many of us have “been there and done that”. However, if we marry young and get overwhelmed early on, we can be so intensely focused on the treadmill that we never even know we’re on it. For those who are awake, like you are, there are decisions to be made. There is choice. Yes, the world needs cogs, it wouldn’t turn without them, but you are still in the driver’s seat. By that I mean the next step for you is to see that your life isn’t going to “turn out”. You’re not going to be automatically provided with answers and opportunities and, conversely, it’s not necessarily over.
You can take the reins and chart another course. The very valuable one you have just finished doesn’t have to be the end. Look beneath the surface of your discontent for your skills and your dreams. You did what you set out to do…great. You’ve gotten your degree and you’re working at what you are trained for. The bills are getting paid and you’re independent. Success! Congratulations!
Now turn the page and go back to the drawing board. What do you want next? If you miss school you don’t ever have to stop going you know. If you feel the most comfortable there…would you like to teach? How do you want to make a difference? It won’t just happen but you can make it happen. There are many diverse concepts of making a difference. As you mature, it may evolve from drama and fame to more subtle levels in your immediate sphere of influence. That’s the adventure, to keep on learning and to keep on growing. Be a cognitive cog and expand. Blessings, Luise