Question: Dear Luise: I am 24 years old. I have 2 young children and 1 one the way who is due in May 2010. My daughter is the oldest and is 3years old and my son is 2years. My fiancé and I have been together for 6 years (they are our children together). My problem is that my fiancé hates our son. My son is a bit of a cry-baby. He cries for everything. You can do that nicest things for him and he still cries. He bothers a lot but my thinking is what child doesn’t. I don’t know what to do. I ask him if he loves our son and he just shrugs his shoulders. He can’t even stand to look at our son. Don’t get me wrong; we definitely have our good days. But, the bad out weigh them at the most. But, my fiancé loves our daughter to no end. I don’t want my son to grow up like that. I understand that our son is difficult. But, I find it in me to deal with him and take the time with him to teach him differently. My fiancé just doesn’t seem to care about our son at all. I don’t know what to do. Help please. Some advice. A.
Answer: Dear A.: I think your situation is serious and it is about to become more serious as your little boy becomes the middle child and your new baby necessarily takes you away from him. Please find a child psychologist to work with you. A parent hating a child is horrible. Your son knows it, I’m sure. For an adult to hate a baby is more childish than any cry-baby could possibly be. And then your son gets to watch his father openly loving his sister. It has to stop or permanent damage will occur no matter how hard you try to offset what is going on. Blessings, Luise