Question: Dear Luise: We raised our Granddaughter from the time she was 12 till she was 18. When she met her current husband she started changing in her attitude with us. They had a premature baby and we were there for all of them from the very beginning and for the first year things went fairly well even though she did stop us from seeing them for a short time because I fed him a bottle she did not want him to have but I did not know that and she was outside at the time. We could not see them for about two months when she started letting us see them again. Then one day I made a phone call to find out some information concerning and she got mad over that and has not let us see our Great Grandson since then He just had his second birthday and we were not even invited to the party and also she has another son and we have not seen him at all and he is 5 months old. We have never done anything harmful to the children nor the parents. I would like to know if I can take any legal action to get visitation. J.
Answer: Dear J.: Grandparent Rights differ from state to state if you are in the U.S. You would need to see an attorney. Before you do that, please consider coming over to my Web-forum www.WiseWomenUnite.com for feedback from other women who are facing the same thing. You may win but you may also lose. Parents can turn children against others if they are motivated to do so.
Your granddaughter has adult status and is at choice regarding her children and all of the other aspects in her life. She has created a new family unit and they make the rules there…just like you did when you started your own family unit…(although I am sure yours made more sense and were more fair.) Your contribution to her for the six years you had her is not a factor except in your heart nor are your perfectly reasonable expectations. She has no obligations to honor either. For most of us, this is very painful to accept and get past. I know because I have been there. Blessings, Luise