Question: Dear Luise: Why and how can my adult children be so cold and distant? M.
Answer: Dear M.: I have had so many people write to me about this, that I have created a separate Web-forum for issues concerning adult children and extended families. Go to www.WiseWomenUnite.com . You will find support and understanding there.
You also might want to read “When Parents Hurt” by Coleman. For many, the “why” doesn’t help much because it doesn’t change anything…and for others there is no why. It seems to be a cultural-social shift that is almost becoming the norm.
One school of thought suggests that children are growing up with a sense of entitlement that seems to overshadow loyalty and respect. Parents try too hard and sacrifice too much and then are kicked to the curb by ungrateful offspring who don’t need them any longer. Such behavior seems to be justified by a long list of real or imagined imperfections in the parents, the rationalization thus circumventing guilt.
Of course each situation is different and I am writing in generalities. You deserve so much better. We all do. Blessings, Luise